Digging a Hole
by Collyns
Summary: CEO Edward Cullen has it all: wealth, devilish good looks, gorgeous women. And yet he's irrevocably – obsessively – head-over-heels for his best friend Isabella Swan, a self-proclaimed lesbian. What's a guy to do in a situation like this?  E/B, AU


_**Digging a Hole**_

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**I do not own Twilight or any of its characters in any way. I do, however, own this story :)

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**Prologue: Dear Old Sparky**

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"_I need you," she moaned, opening her legs wider, "Baby please, don't make me wait…"_

_He quickly pushed into her warmth, holding back a groan as he stilled his movements to savor the moment. _

_So wet…and tight…_

"_F-faster!" she called out, wrapping her legs around him. "I want…want to feel all of you."_

_He obliged by pushing deeper into her, before pulling out and roughly slamming back in. _

"_You want that?" he pumped away, grabbing her hair and pulling back. "You like it rough, don't you?"_

"_Y-yes baby, right there, ahhhhh!"_

_She felt so good…he's been waiting years for this and it has finally happened. It was better than any of his dreams, to have her naked, moaning, and sweaty underneath him as he drove into her. _

_He bent his head to greedily suck on a hard nipple, while at the same reaching down to rub her._

"_Oh Edward!" she screamed, "Yes Edward harder! Yes! Also, don't forget about father's birthday bash!"_

_What?_

"_Ahhhh, yes, give it to me baby! It'll be held at the Plaza."_

_Was this really the best time to talk about his father's party? He was so close…this could wait until later, right?_

"_What are you wearing?" she asked, raking her nails down his back._

"_Baby," he said through clenched teeth, "this isn't the best time to be asking this. I'm almost finish."_

"Almost finished with what?"

Huh?

Quickly opening his eyes, Edward found himself staring into a pair of green ones looking curiously back at him. What happened to the brown ones he was expecting?

"Are you okay man?" his brother Jasper asked him, smirking slightly. "I can give you some privacy to…_finish_, if you want."

"Fuck off," he shot back, trying to shake remnants of the daydream out of his mind only to be met with laughter.

"Wait until Em hear's about this!" Jasper laughed, clutching his stomach. "What is it, another dream about Bella?"

"Fuck you man!"

"What number is this? The third time today you had to jack off to her image? _Jesus_ man, you must have a dick of steel because even I can't do that, and you _know_ how horny Alice gets –"

Oh god, he did not want to hear _that_. Especially when he had a meeting with her in a couple of minutes.

"Are you done?" he snapped, straightening himself up and adjusting the hard evidence of his arousal.

"No," Jasper raised an eyebrow, "are you?"

Argh.

"You need to get laid, man, because this is seriously getting old."

"Don't I know it," he mumbled, shoving papers into his briefcase.

"I mean, I know women consider you hot and all but I can honestly say that this is one deal you won't seal."

"Why thank you for that vote of confidence," he snapped his briefcase shut loudly as he quickly stood up from his seat, shooting Jasper an irritated look. "My hard-as-nail dick and the painful blue balls that come with it are very gracious for your input. Now if you're done analyzing, I'd like to remind you that we have a meeting with Alice in two minutes."

"Yea yea, I get it, you don't want to talk about it." Jasper said, still smirking before annoyingly adding, "But you gotta face the facts man. Give it up."

Gladly. He would if he could, because he of all people knew very well how impossible their relationship would be – that is, if she ever even agreed to a relationship. Too bad he had a pole instead of a hole because he had a feeling she'd agree readily if he'd just cut that whole part off and add a bit of extra padding above.

Alas, he was far too fond of his dear old sparky to part with it. There were too many memories shared, and sparky had been with him through all the hard times.

Heh. Play on words.

"_Oh god,"_ he thought, "_my life has been reverted to one big sex joke_."

He might as well call it quits, shave his head and become celibate because at the rate he was going, he wasn't even going to need a dick. His pal – "Little Eddy," as the source of his sexual-frustration calls it, despite the fact that it was in no where shape or form _little_ – only stood up for one girl and unfortunately, she didn't give a rat's ass.

Because Isabella Swan, the love of his life and the dream-mother of his future-fantasy-children, was a lesbian.

And she kept it no big secret either.

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What do you think? Yay or Nay? Review and tell me! (:

Also I apologize for any grammatical mistakes! I do not yet have a beta :'(


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